‘On your next birthday, count the candles on your birthday cake and know that you are brighter and more full of light than every single one of them.’
If you had told me that I would be writing this sat at a desk in an apartment in the Czech Republic, after putting sanitary towels in the freezer a year ago I wouldn’t have believed you.
I never would have thought I would be waking up alone either, in a different country with no friends or family wishing me happy birthday, no cards to open and no puppy to give me the licks that I have missed these last few days.
Most years I have the birthday blues, but being away from my family and friends this year has made me feel a lot worse, I feel so far away from my goals and just feel so clueless about where I am, it has really built up this year into a sense of failure. Where am I going? What am I doing? Why haven’t I met the one? What am I doing wrong? All these questions are swirling in my head and I have zero answers.
Ironically I wanted to make this post a light hearted and happier one. I am with my best friend whilst she has surgery here in Prague and I want to make sure she is safe and happy. Surgery is a big deal and can be so scary for someone who has never experienced it before. So I guess this is where the sanitary towels in the freezer come in. No I am not having a mental breakdown, its just me being a good friend and trying to make some DIY ice packs!
So turning 26 feels like a big deal. It feels like I have finally broken in to the adult world and there is no going back. So whilst I want to look forward and set more goals for the next year, what have I achieved in the last 365 days?! Looking back at last years goals I didn’t really achieve many of them.
I really wanted to hit the goal weight of 160lbs this year, and getting an 100kg deadlift and maybe even 150kg. I also wanted to hit a bodyweight squat. All of the above went to shit. The lowest weight I have seen this year is 174lbs which I am currently hovering around. Thanks to my body hating me (multiple injuries + chronic pain disorder) I had to take a break from deadlifts and I didn’t attempt to squat all year. I actually attempted some squats yesterday, trying to beat the fear and I hit 45kg for 3 reps after 3 sets of at 40kg. Its half bodyweight which after a year is better than nothing, right?!
One positive is I completed my Personal training course! Wooo-hooo! After a little self-sabotage and then panicking I managed to pull it out the bag and I am over the moon to say I am now a qualified Personal trainer! I also left my job in the NHS for more money but sadly the grass isn’t always greener. I also got a gorgeous new member of the family, my beautiful niece Rose and a new bestie Amanda Bootes to add to my lonesome squad (legit one of the best things that has happened to me!).
Goals for 26
I love setting goals, they are a great way to feel accomplished and make you feel like you are going in the right direction (even though half the time I swear I am going backwards). Here are some goals for the year ahead:
- Hit a goal weight of 150-160lbs
- Deadlift 100kg
- Squat bodyweight
- Complete my nutrition course
- New job (fitness related)
- Save £500 for Disneyworld in May
- Focus more on the blog/insta
- Incorporate a more plant based approach to my diet
- Build a emergency fund + work on becoming debt-free
I believe it is better to have a mixture of goals to keep you interested and focused. I have some adultish ones, fitness ones, diet ones and some more maybe just to keep in the back of my head.
So now my rambling is over, let us all celebrate me turning 26, another year older but not another year wiser. Hip-Hip Hooray.